I have been struggling with alot of issues since returning from Brazil. Just when it seemed like things were so overwhelming and out of control, along comes an unexpected storm.
One of my closest friends was suddenly diagnosed with Acute Leukemia and air-lifted to a hospital in San Antonio just a few days ago.
I had spent the day with her at work and even though I knew she hadn't been feeling too well, I had no idea what devastating news I would be getting later that evening. The phone call came and as I heard her voice I realized that she was scared. She began to ask me to pray. I couldn't even comprehend the words as she spoke them..."the doctor said I have leukemia and I need you to start praying now, I'm scared". I played this conversation over and over in my head as I tried to wrap my mind around it. I was so scared that I would lose my BFFER. I began to question, "God, what are you doing? I need my girl". I was also filled with fear and anxiety that she would not survive and that I would have to live my life here on this earth, without her. I will also admit that I was angry. I began to ask God "why? As if my life's circumstances weren't already stressful and overwhelming enough, how could you do this to me?" Selfishly, I asked God "really?" How could this be happening.
One of my closest friends was suddenly diagnosed with Acute Leukemia and air-lifted to a hospital in San Antonio just a few days ago.
I had spent the day with her at work and even though I knew she hadn't been feeling too well, I had no idea what devastating news I would be getting later that evening. The phone call came and as I heard her voice I realized that she was scared. She began to ask me to pray. I couldn't even comprehend the words as she spoke them..."the doctor said I have leukemia and I need you to start praying now, I'm scared". I played this conversation over and over in my head as I tried to wrap my mind around it. I was so scared that I would lose my BFFER. I began to question, "God, what are you doing? I need my girl". I was also filled with fear and anxiety that she would not survive and that I would have to live my life here on this earth, without her. I will also admit that I was angry. I began to ask God "why? As if my life's circumstances weren't already stressful and overwhelming enough, how could you do this to me?" Selfishly, I asked God "really?" How could this be happening.
I cried all weekend. My heart was breaking. I tried to be strong but deep inside my heart, I was hurting. I am not sure I've ever begged God harder for anything. I begged and pleaded for Him to let her be ok. I prayed so intently and as I was in worship that Sunday morning, crying and worhipping my Father, I heard Him say "Now, you say you give me EVERYTHING, what about Kelly?"....I heard these words so clearly and of course, like a child I began to say, "I have given you EVER
YTHING, but.....but.....I don't know if I can give you Kelly"....then as I continued in worship I began to realize, EVERYTHING means EVERYTHING and I prayfully aknowledged that I have to lay EVERYTHING down at His feet, even Kelly. So, yes, God she's yours! I layed her at His feet, and asked for His will, not mine!
12/12/10 Needless to say, He is constantly teaching me and refining me. I have been to visit my BFFER a couple of times and we talk everyday. She has completed 2 rounds of chemo and starts her 3rd next week. She's had some minor bumps in the road and we've prayed continuously for her healing. She has complete faith that God is and will continue to heal her. We all stand in agreement that He is healing her in Jesus name, and that she will be healthy and whole again, it's just a matter of time. She is trusting in God in a new and deeper way than she's ever known. Her relationship with Jesus is evident in her strength and courage as she fights this battle with Leukemia. She is an amazing soldier in the army of God! She's standing strong and courageous! She is studying the word and shining the love of Jesus to all that cross her path. The nurses and doctors there are touched by her every day. She's the sweetest, most precious child of God! I love you, BFFER!
Please add Kelly to your prayers. It is a long road and she needs all of us to lift her up every moment. If she comes to your mind, please just say a quick prayer for her. She feels everyone's prayers. She's feeling God's healing hands upon her! She's gonna have a great story to tell of God's great healing in her life.....can't wait for the next chapter!
YTHING, but.....but.....I don't know if I can give you Kelly"....then as I continued in worship I began to realize, EVERYTHING means EVERYTHING and I prayfully aknowledged that I have to lay EVERYTHING down at His feet, even Kelly. So, yes, God she's yours! I layed her at His feet, and asked for His will, not mine!
12/12/10 Needless to say, He is constantly teaching me and refining me. I have been to visit my BFFER a couple of times and we talk everyday. She has completed 2 rounds of chemo and starts her 3rd next week. She's had some minor bumps in the road and we've prayed continuously for her healing. She has complete faith that God is and will continue to heal her. We all stand in agreement that He is healing her in Jesus name, and that she will be healthy and whole again, it's just a matter of time. She is trusting in God in a new and deeper way than she's ever known. Her relationship with Jesus is evident in her strength and courage as she fights this battle with Leukemia. She is an amazing soldier in the army of God! She's standing strong and courageous! She is studying the word and shining the love of Jesus to all that cross her path. The nurses and doctors there are touched by her every day. She's the sweetest, most precious child of God! I love you, BFFER!
Please add Kelly to your prayers. It is a long road and she needs all of us to lift her up every moment. If she comes to your mind, please just say a quick prayer for her. She feels everyone's prayers. She's feeling God's healing hands upon her! She's gonna have a great story to tell of God's great healing in her life.....can't wait for the next chapter!
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